Medical
Passive-Aggressive Chlamydia
4.7 stars23,655 reviews
Arrives with no announcement, then somehow makes the entire situation feel like your fault.
- Rarity
- Rare
- Severity
- Socially inconvenient
- Success Rate
- 86%
- Manifestations remaining
- 976
Product details
Arrives with no announcement, then somehow makes the entire situation feel like your fault.
- Classified as a Rare Medical filing.
- Non-harmful / non-permanent inconvenience only.
- Confirmed by Bureau inspectors before fulfillment.
Manufacturer
Crow & Candle
Handcrafted misfortune for discerning households.
A luxury boutique maker of ornate curses, wax seals, and excessive certificates.
- Founded
- 1766
- Headquarters
- Savannah, GA
- Known for
- Luxury social curses and ceremonial packaging
- Warranty
- White-glove hex concierge support
Side effects
May produce vague apology drafts and a sudden interest in appointment scheduling.
Filed reviews
Showing selected excerpts from 23,655 filed reviews.
5/5 stamped formsVerified Hex Owner
“Passive-Aggressive Chlamydia performed exactly as filed. Elegant, socially devastating, and apparently gift-wrappable.”
5/5 stamped formsVerified Hex Owner
“Crow & Candle has clearly overfunded the nuisance department. Created just enough awkward silence to be legally considered ambiance.”
4/5 stamped formsVerified Hex Owner
“Boutique emotional inconvenience with a surprisingly polished finish.”
Specifications
- Rarity
- Rare
- Severity
- Socially inconvenient
- Success rate
- 86%
- Delivery estimate
- Arrives in 3-5 business hauntings
Arcane compliance filing
- Certification authority
- Bureau of Arcane Commerce
- License number
- BAC-MED-RAR-O7BR
- Approved inconvenience class
- Medical / Rare
- Filing jurisdiction
- Domestic and workplace environments
- Last inspection date
- Most recent quarterly filing
- Known side effects
- May produce vague apology drafts and a sudden interest in appointment scheduling.
